(Originally appeared in THE HORROR SHOW magazine, Summer 1983)

You're really a magazine writer? Such a long time since I had any writers visit. And you're a nice looking young man, too. Some of them aren't, you know. Well, come in, come in. Hang your coat over there on the rack and sit down here where I can get a better look at you. My, such a handsome boy.

I suppose I ought to tell you, I don't entertain many visitors these days: I mean most of them just come to the door asking nosy questions about how old the house is and would I like to sell it. I usually tell them to go away. But then just now I looked out through the curtain and saw you on the porch, and you reminded me so much of Nate - Nate was my husband you know - that I just had to let you in. Does that embarrass you? No? Well you probably think I'm a crazy old woman, only you're too polite to say so. What's the name of your magazine again? People? No, I'm afraid I can't say I've heard of it. I don't get out much any more. Can't read much when I do; the eyes, you know.

To tell you the truth, I'm surprised you'd want to write about me. There's nothing very interesting about my life, it was my family that was newsworthy. But then, you said you'd read all about that, didn't you?

I was born right here in this house in 1897. But really dear, you don't want to hear all the dreadfully boring details of my childhood. The only interesting thing that ever entered my life was Nate - you should write your article about him. Nate was such a colorful person. In plainer language, he was a liar and a womanizer and he cheated at cards.

You're surprised? Well why shouldn't I love him anyway? He was my husband after all. You have to understand that in those days a woman stood by her husband no matter what. All this divorce business simply wasn't done back then.

Not that living with him was easy, let me tell you.

We got married in 1915 right here in our garden, well at least it used to be a garden, and there were so many guests! You have no idea. And my father was so relieved to finally have me marry - a girl in those days could just about give up hope if she hadn't found a husband by the time she was eighteen. Not that I was homely or anything like that; I just had - have - a unique outlook.

You'll understand.

We lived here with the family, of course. That's the way it was done then; families stayed together. A couple never really got to know each other until after the wedding - that's the way it was done - so if the choice was a bad one you weren't going to know until it was too late to do anything about it. One simply did not disgrace one's family name with the dishonor of divorce. Wasn't done.

Don't nod off, dear, it's very rude.

So what do you suppose a young woman could do if she found herself married to a louse with designs on the family fortune? Nothing, that's what. Not that you should get me wrong here - there were still certain aspects of Nate's personality I admired. He was what we used to call "rakishly" handsome, and he could dance just wonderfully. But his bad habits...

Oh, forgive me, I meant to pour you some tea; I had it all fixed when you rang. There. Now where was I? Nate's bad habits, wasn't it?

Well he was greedy for one thing, and for another he had a wandering eye for the women. In fact it turned out he'd been married before and had run out on his first wife. She was dead by the time we married; I knew that because my father and cousin Jonathan made a point of finding out, though I don't doubt for a minute that Nate could easily have added bigamy to his lengthy list of sins.

Is the tea all right, dear? Good, I'm glad you like it. I hope I'm not going too fast for you, by the way. If I should slow down, just tell me.

The story really became interesting about the time when my father and Jonathan uncovered Nate's scheme. It seems he'd intended to murder us all and pocket the family's assets. We weren't tremendously wealthy, mind you, but a dollar went a lot farther in those days. Fortunately, Nate also had his drinking and his big mouth.

Cousin Jonathan heard of his plans from one of their mutual drinking companions, and that very same night Nate disappeared. Well, there was an investigation, naturally; the police asking a lot of questions, the usual. But in the end everyone accepted Jonathan's story that he'd simply persuaded Nate to leave. I even believed it myself for a while. Until I found the grave. I knew it was his even if it wasn't marked, but I made certain a few days later. It was very shallow, you see, and I could dig just far enough to... Well, let's just say I knew the suit of clothes he was wearing when he left the house that night.

I suppose Jonathan must have killed him, I mean who else could have done it? Of course I never asked him, that wouldn't have been proper. You don't understand how different things were in those days, dear, and anyhow I should tell you none of us much cared how Nate had left us, as long as he had.

I was left in a rather peculiar situation, though. Everyone assuming I was an abandoned wife. Naturally that meant I couldn't entertain new suitors, and they couldn't entertain me. You can't imagine how miserable life was. Nine long years. And by the end of that time I was all alone here, just these four walls and I. That is, until I finally thought of something I could do about it.

Here, help yourself to more tea, dear.

You see in those nine lonely years I'd sort of "repainted" Nate. I'd thought so much about the few good traits he'd possessed that I suppose I created an ideal of him and forgot all about the nastier side of his personality. He was so nice looking. You really do favor him, a little.

You might consider it odd, but I decided there wasn't really any reason why I couldn't have the ideal I'd created. All I had to do was find a nice young man with all the proper qualities. And it took me some searching, but I found an absolutely charming young man named William Hunt; he was such a co-operative soul. Even answered to Nate's name. He stayed here for over a year, but then somewhere around 1927 I think it was, things just didn't seem to be going right anymore and he left.

I have to confess it didn't turn out as I'd expected. But then, I just hadn't gotten it right yet. I knew I could. I was just going about it all wrong, that's all.

Why are you looking at your tea so oddly? You'd think there was a bug in it or something. Finish it off, why don't you, there's something in the other room I'd like to show you. All gone? Good, now just follow me, dear, and watch your step here, there's a throw rug. You know I was going to say, the ideal husband would never even think of cheating on his wife, let alone gambling or drinking or smoking in the house. Disgusting habits. I'm sure you would never do any of those things. You're such a marvellously good listener, too, did I tell you that?

Oh, here we are. This is the sitting room. Come on in, you don't have to be shy. You see the wing-backed chair facing the fireplace? It was always Nate's favorite chair. Now if you'll just step over and...

What was that again, dear, I can't hear you when you mumble. Oh? Well I'm sorry you're not feeling well, but I really don't know what the tea could have to do with it. It was perfectly good tea, I can assure you. I'd really hoped you could stay long enough to...

Well, if you really must go. Will you forgive me if I don't show you to the door? Come and see me again some time when you're feeling better, I did so enjoy our talk.

Good night.

Such a nice young man. And handsome; wasn't he handsome? A shame he had to leave so soon, I'd hoped the two of you could chat. I would have explained to him how I finally got it right - I'm sure he'd have been interested. Of course, it took me a while, but you know I've never let anything stand in my way when it came to getting something I really wanted.

In your case, though, I only wonder why on earth I didn't think of it years sooner. Stupid of me. All that time wasted. And the answer so simple.

Oh well. I have you back, and just the way I wanted you; I guess that's all that matters. You're home now. No more drinking and gambling and smoking in the house. And you listen just divinely. Precisely as I wanted you.

I didn't really mind working just a little harder to get the real you back again, Nate.

I didn't mind at all.

-The End-